So the UK’s Medicines and Healthcare products Regulatory Agency (MHRA) has decided to review and consolidate legislation on medicines in the UK, with the stated aim of making the whole thing simpler to wade through. A laudable aim, and one that more lawsmiths should bear in mind. I recall my law tutor at Stirling University commencing his dissection of a newly-passed Act with “The primary aim of the legislators in drafting this law was to make it as complex and incomprehensible as possible, and in this they succeeded admirably.”
The problem being, their claim is: “can be used in place of Homeopathic drops or tablets”. It doesn’t exactly inspire confidence, but on the other hand you can’t fault them for their honesty. Look, I just wanted to get a post off on a positive note and say something nice, okay? Fine. Now hand me the WTFometer, dear, I feel a debollocksing coming on.
Today’s Woo Special is something that I have managed to avoid writing about so far, not for any altruistic reasons so much as it’s very difficult to type with tears of mirth streaming down your cheeks. Please empty mouths and bladders before reading further, as uncontrolled WTF can be messy. Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you: the e-pebble.
There are times when mere words are insufficient. There are times when reflecting on the genius of Bach, or Pasteur, or Sequoyah is not enough to help me hope that maybe, just maybe, the human race deserves to survive.
This is one of those times. We will speak, if you will, of the colour indigo. It is an attractive colour, one of my favourites. It is soothing: it recalls the colour of the sea on a sunny day, the sky as night draws on, the rainbow after a deluge. It is cool: it looks good on suede shoes, all the way up to the occasional lunatic spiky hairstyle (it matches my eyes, OK?).
Despite Douglas Adams’ jokes about superintelligent shades of the colour blue, however, it has no healing powers whatsoever. Mystical or otherwise. This is the Bullshit Zone. This, if you like, is where we exceed the speed of pure, unadulterated WTF in a vacuum. Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you:
Ok, let’s not beat about the bush: it’s homeopathy. As such they already score pretty high on the oh-jesus-wept-are-these-guys-serious scale, which goes from zero to any infinity you like in just about any direction you like, except normality. They’re selling sugar, lactose, water and alcohol as expensive remedies for various ailments, real or imagined.